Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Time passes


I was talking recently with a friend about what we do, girls, and began to enumerate them, feeling sorry for me, my last weeks - months? years?, those in which my son was sick and had a fever, so I ran all night in the ER and from there they sent me home with an ironic grin telling me that, yes, it's a virus that fuss as more cool kids.
And do fever, so the story went, 3, 4 in the morning, in the coming days. 7 Meanwhile, fresh, PR smile, I had to be at work, then the courses Dutch child was at home, not eating and not feeling well, then my husband became ill and had lain, a few days.
In fact, after classes I have on the Dutch master - from 6-10 pm and I remembered that I have two projects to be finished and to teach them this week, that I wrote a long time ago and that neglect my required readings, I look like hell and there I stopped combing a week, these shampoos luck and evil substances you stuck in a picture publicly acceptable.
Then my jaw was swollen and I went to the dentist and he told me, with a superior air, they are oh my ass and it is a serious business and that you neglect, lady, 35 years of your e inadmissible also have problems, then I ran there again in courses where they told me that I must justify absences and there children call home, not have to sit their ass all the time after that, the , longer sick children, then I went home and I had a fight with my husband.
At home, the child told me it was my turn to get up with him this morning, and did not understand why not do that, lately, after I spent so much to him and he saw on television a pretty blonde dancing and wants to change me, like a mother smiling and shaped, like that, to dance with him at home all the time. After that I thought I had to do the food, it would not hurt to wash some laundry in May, that I have no idea what lies in the freezer and that and gathered dust. On my treasure belly ached, but he never complained ears or head.
In college, I met with some colleagues who asked me if I was sick and told me that I have dark circles, I look pretty crappy and that should take some pills or something.
The evening had to come to a party - be glamorous, I said, I had jaw all swollen, sore and hurt a little louder than the chest, the party relaxed world, people with normal jobs, relatively balanced daily rhythm, good humor includes both. We had 16 inches heels and knees were hurting me so I stayed over in convenient positions, I assumed the role of photographer.
Then I got home and looked at the clock, it was almost one. Tic-tac - one minute, two minutes, I went to the bathroom mirror, to feel sorry for me and when I looked there I saw a woman of 35 years, two months, three weeks, eight hours and two minutes. And I realized that no matter how much compassion I managed to collect for me the minute the needle goes forward, and three, and four. As time goes by as much calm, anger and helplessness over my daily shit everywhere, silk stockings and heels over 16 cm and over and over simulations and glamor over the hours lost in traffic. That why I did not expect anyone any confirmation of my inner beauty or power, from anyone, besides me, fuck wife dressed compassion and sensitivity and that time did not turn anyone absolutely anyone back that every day is fundamentally important and should not live in the past, because if you slipped into this dumb mistake, their crap, wine, bury you, you sing and give some boiled wheat, alms, for your soul, then, bye, see you after seven years, or not, it is no longer practical.
Then I looked again in the mirror and I saw it. She was kidding, of feeling, I would say, with his right knee, makeup flawless, one of that, the pops, you know, when you see her on the street, but that still would not put up with you, you are dependent and weak and she's beautiful and has a free and exceptional family and when stepping on earth knows he can see a handbreadth above, over umbrellas. Show that picture to say it's made by a crazy guy who wants the same moment to kiss you all over, from head to heel, and the camera instantly. What picture hard, told me the next day, my friend, who you did it, frisky hopelessly in love with a guy?
I did, I single, beautiful and proud of me, I was that guy, I was so dear to me, I love me die, I got it last night at 35, two months, three weeks, eight hours and two minutes, the first time in my life when I saw in the mirror.

Tic-tac, girls! Time passes and nobody, absolutely nobody, do not back out of the way.



foto credit: google.com

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